Ten years ago, buying cannabis was like visiting the Wild West, especially when it came to procuring and ingesting edibles. Before California legalized the recreational use of Cannabis in 2016, dosing could get a bit wild. And in the very early days of legalized weed, you would buy edible cookies or candies wrapped in foil or Saran Wrap. They would come dosed in one of two ways: strong and less strong, and both were powerful to the point of frightening.
These days, thanks to regulations, getting a perfect dose is so easy and totally commonplace. That is, however, unless you accidentally take too many edibles. Overestimating one’s dosage is still pretty commonplace. Not only that, there are a variety of reasons that someone could end up blasted. This includes tolerance, age, metabolic rate, and how you consumed said cannabis. Concentrates are still the strongest form of consumption, which is why you feel like you’re dying after you dab. Whatever reason you’ve come to the School of Mandatory Cannabis: I’m Too High Edition, we’ve got your back.
First of all, you’re going to be fine. You’re going to survive the overwhelming and uncomfortable feelings you’re experiencing. But as the saying goes, the only way out is through. So you’re still going to have to commit to making it through the existential hell you’re in right now, and once it’s over, it’s over. If you’re not so high your face is melting off, but you have been or might be sometime in the future, go ahead and bookmark this. You’ll thank us for it the next time you think your heart has stopped but really you’re just blitzed.
Photo: KatarzynaBialasiewicz (Getty Images)
when youre too high
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The Peppercorn Method
It might sound insane, but chewing on black peppercorns is rumored to diminish the "whoa" effect of feeling super high. In fact, it's Neil Young's go-to solution for being too blazed. He told this to Howard Stern in an interview in 2014: “Try black pepper balls if you get paranoid. Just chew two or three pieces. I just found this out myself. Try it.”
While peppercorns haven't been scientifically proven to cure cannabis intoxication, data indicates that pepper contains the terpene beta-caryophyllene, which is believed to reduce anxiety.
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The Shower Method
Look, there isn't any evidence to support that The Shower Method will cure you of feeling too stoned. However, showers feel great and are totally relaxing. Plus, many people who've overconsumed cannabis swear by it.
One tip we got from a geriatric stoner (aka a Gen Xer) says to turn the water from freezing cold to burning hot. It will shock your system and snap you out of the existential hell you're going through.
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The Snacking Method
There are a variety of reasons why people get too blazed. Usually it's overconsumption of cannabis, but sometimes it's because you just didn't eat enough that day.
Even if you ate an adequate amount, getting stoned gives you the munchies, so you're going to want to eat anyways. It's just that you might want to eat from a completely catatonic state.
This is why you should always prepare snacks before you toke up.
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The Lemon Method
Suck on a lemon. No, seriously. Cut a lemon wedge then chew it to snap you out of your Frankenstein state.
That's because the terpene limonene, found in both lemons and certain marijuana strains, has been studied for its anxiety-reducing effects.
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The Lifeline Method
When you're stuck inside your head, tortured by a weed-induced existential crisis, what you need is a lifeline. We take ours in the form of a friend who's less high and who can swoop in and remind us that we're going to be fine and this will pass...eventually.
Sometimes, there's nothing like a trusted friend or lover helping you get back into reality. So use your lifeline and contact someone calming in your life.
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The Pizza-Breathing Method
The Pizza-Breathing Method is a system developed based on Box Breathing, a technique used to self-soothe and decrease anxiety, two things that will lead to relief when you've ingested too much marijuana.
How it works is simple. Like the three sides of the pizza you're going to inhale for three seconds, hold your breath for three seconds and exhale for three seconds. And you keep doing this until you feel better.
You can use The Pizza Breathing Method for much more than when you're blazed to hell; however, it's a lifesaver when you are.
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The Pine Nut Method
Some studies show that eating pine nuts might cut down on the negative effects of being high. It's likely because Pinene, a compound in pine nuts, is understood to induce a feeling of calm and clarity. Plus, pinene is a kind of terpene sometimes found in cannabis that produces the pine-like flavor and aroma in weed.
However, if you don't have pine nuts around, you might have pesto sauce. Pesto contains pine nuts. So perhaps a light stoned stack of penne with pesto?
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The CBD Method
You probably already know that CBD reduces anxiety, but did you know that it can also curb the horrible effects of overconsuming THC?
How it works is complicated, but basically, CBD doesn't bind to the brain's CB1 receptors like THC does, so it basically prevents THC from doing its job. Consequently, this means you'll stop feeling loopy and weird and possibly start enjoying yourself.
