Photo: 1001nights (Getty)
That Australian janitor that was left traumatized after he cleaned up his co-workers’ orgy probably isn’t a fan of orgies, and it seems like he’s not the only one, because some dude on Twitter decided to share his thoughts on orgies. And let’s just say he wouldn’t want to find himself in them.
The guy named Justin, but known as WeNotSucks on Twitter, apparently was inspired to talk orgies, because that’s exactly what he did. And as hot as porn makes orgies look, or as they look in your fantasies, this dude wanted to remind you that it’s honestly not all great.
This guy kind of makes some great points. Check out his rant below.
An orgy would be so awkward for me. Cause after like 2 minutes I’m just gon be sitting around bored.
— justin (@WeNotSocks) March 8, 2017
Plus what if I spend $200 to get in to the orgy and nobody want me. I just paid $200 to not be alone for the night.
— justin (@WeNotSocks) March 8, 2017
“Yo how was the orgy.”
“I was beating this chick from the back and some nigga smacked me on the ass and said good job so I left.”
“Oh.”
— justin (@WeNotSocks) March 8, 2017
It’d be my luck I pay $200 for an orgy, get there, strip, & all of a sudden women have a size requirement now I’m little Timmy in the corner
— justin (@WeNotSocks) March 8, 2017
I’m not an orgy kind of person. I like going raw. So an orgy is like going to a buffet with your jaw sewn shut for me unless I wanna die.
— justin (@WeNotSocks) March 8, 2017
Not to mention, no phones are allowed in the orgy. How I’m supposed to check the scores for the game after I nut in 3 minutes
— justin (@WeNotSocks) March 8, 2017
Imagine you in an orgy and everybody else just stop and stare at how bad you’re doing.
— justin (@WeNotSocks) March 8, 2017
Instead of spending $200 on an orgy Ima get a bottle of rum and alternate hands at home.
— justin (@WeNotSocks) March 8, 2017
Like you imagine yourself in an orgy and it’s going wonderful in your imagination. Real life you nut in 2 minutes and wanna go home.
— justin (@WeNotSocks) March 8, 2017
You don’t wanna nut quick in an orgy so you pop a viagra. Now you the dude nobody fucking standing around mad hard all night for no reason.
— justin (@WeNotSocks) March 8, 2017
I’m not big on planned orgies. I like the ones that start organically during a game of Kings
— justin (@WeNotSocks) March 8, 2017
Imagine being sober at an orgy that had a Facebook event for it. How you explain that to Jesus.
“Well Jesus I ain’t wanna be rude…”
— justin (@WeNotSocks) March 8, 2017
I can’t satisfy one woman sexually at a time. You telling me I’m going to pay to go to an orgy to disappoint several?
— justin (@WeNotSocks) March 8, 2017
“Would you rather have tacos or an orgy?”
“What kind of tacos? Know what, nevermind. Don’t even matter. I want tacos.”
— justin (@WeNotSocks) March 8, 2017
I wasn’t even aware that breakfast was available. I take back everything I said. https://t.co/SQFccR0HW3
— justin (@WeNotSocks) March 8, 2017
Young people have complicated birthday requests. Orgies, tables at the club, hotel suites. I just want tacos.
— justin (@WeNotSocks) March 8, 2017
Put a taco bar next to my bed and I promise even if I’m alone based on how aroused I’ll be you’ll think it’s an orgy.
— justin (@WeNotSocks) March 8, 2017
This dude may or may not have been high during this rant. In other news, I guess I should cancel my orgy.
h/t FHM
